- "out to lunch"
- "yeah... totally"
- "i'm hungry"
- "i have a really big head!"
- "please! please! i promise i'll be quiet, i'll chew gum!" (on wanting to watch x-files with us)
- "blue discharge"
- olive garden; "WHEN?"
- "i must be a dog; or a four legged animal that snorts!"
- the 100 dollar admission fee
- "i'm going to name my kid shazlina"
- maroon 42
- clam sauce (and other family stories)
- "go pandas!"
- "news stories don't broadcast the story at the same time but do so simultaneously."
- "i am a pathological liar"
- ancient civ vs. premed
- british driving
- "don't worry, it'll wash out" (on a dent on her car)
- "what if i have a shitty wedding cake?"
- ccn and the 8 hour incident
- "i love myself"
- "i was suppost to be retarded"
- "it's just like hockey but without the ice." (on football)
- food analogies ("offering popcorn with no butter," "jumbo shrimp oxymoron with the cake")
- "I'll put it on my debit card" (on pizza delivery)
- "wazzup"
- "'It's 'quality not quantity'... see Lauren, oh wait I don't even have quality" (on sex)
- "Do hickeys get bigger before they get smaller?"
- "We all need to worship small figures like my little poneys."
- "Do I get a gold star?"
- "Do I get a cookie?"
- "I don't like commericals with mummys in them. They are racialy-biased toward egyptian people."
- "you called me a re-re."
- "you're a mo-fo."
- "when they slapped me i cried." (on being born)
- "what a wonderful world... kumbaya my lord kumbaya..."
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